Lame Tumblr Questions

Because when I'm in a creative wasteland I turn to social media?

Because I'm bored and not busy with snapchat?

Does it matter why, when we have so many pointless questions to answer?

1. If you’ve ever tried drugs or alcohol, what was your reason for first trying it?

Let's see...tried alcohol; 12 years old, I was curious about the taste. It was Michelob light, and I didn't like it. I actually started drinking around 13 or 14, but only liquor and wine. I got stoned the first time on Christmas when I was 14. That's when I started smoking regularly. I tried shrooms when I was 18, didn't like it ('cause I had a bad trip). And I tried coke recently, didn't particularly care for it (the taste is awful). My experimentation with various drugs was either curiosity in some respects and self-medication in others (my short foray into pill popping, for example).

2. Do you think you could ever have an abortion if you unexpectedly turned up pregnant right this second?

Depends on whose baby; but honestly I'm too young to have a kid, so yes.

3. If you were far from home and needed to sleep for the night, would you choose to rent a crappy motel room for $60 or sleep in your car for free?

Depends on how long I need to sleep or if I need to shower, stuff like that.

4. Is there a color shirt you’d NEVER wear?

I never wear orange...maybe I subconsciously don't like the colour.

5. Is there a situation where you caved into peer pressure and regretted it?

Not that I can remember. When I told my friends "no" I meant it, and when I did stuff it was because I genuinely wanted to.

6. What is your favorite video game console? Why?

Sega Dreamcast or PS2, both because of nostalgia.

7. Do you like vanilla candles?

Yes?

8. Have you ever been in a relationship that was going great, and then suddenly something weird happened and you just KNEW it was going to be over soon?

I think everyone gets a feeling in their gut when a relationship is about to end. And if I was being truthful, weird stuff just happens in general... I'm not sure how to answer this question.

9. Would you ever bleach your hair platinum blonde?

No. Maybe white. Like Virgin Snow...

10. What are your plans for tomorrow?

To drop dead.

11. What did you have for breakfast?

I don't eat breakfast.

12. Have you had sex in 2014 yet?

Yes.

13. Who last slept in your bed besides you?

Do pets count? Idk, nobody has slept in my bed for awhile... It's a lonely bed.

14. What time did you wake up today?

5-something AM

15. How long until your next birthday?

End of April.

16. What was the last movie you watched?

Rose Red???

17. If you could see any musician live, front row, who would you choose?

Streetlight Manifesto. Also wouldn't mind seeing Trio again.

18. When did you last consume something that had peanut butter?

Last night.

19. What’s the last song you heard?

Probably some stupid thing Mister J played for me. Or was it Billy Idol? I don't even remember.

20. When you say you love someone, do you mean it?

Of course. Don't you? 

21. Do you plan on sleeping in tomorrow?

I wish.

22. Do you still talk to any of your ex’s?

Most of them.

23. As of this minute, what is going through your mind?

Fuck life.

24. Where’s the last place you went?

The park.

25. Have you held hands with anyone lately?

No, it's sad. :(

26. Has anyone let you down recently?

Don't wanna talk about it.

27. Does it bother you when people try to make you jealous?

A little, because it's stupid. But otherwise, no.

28. Whats the next movie you want to see in theaters?

29. Do you have more than $50 in your room?

30. Are both of your blood parents still in your life?

Not really.

31. Were you tired when you woke up this morning?

Fuck yes.

32. Who is probably talking a load of crap about you right now?

I don't think I associate with enough people for that to happen, or at least I hope not....shit.

33. When was the last time you went apple picking?

Never.

34. Do you sometimes wake up in the morning, lay in bed and think about life?

Always.

35. Are you happy christmas is coming soon?

I'm indifferent about Christmas.

36. Do you have drama in your life?

Everybody has drama. How you choose to deal with it is what matters.

Quantum Pheromones

He sent me a snapchat last night!

Why am I so excited?

Dunno.

Just am.

He's fun to talk to....

Yes, I do have a stupid smile on my face.

He genuinely makes me laugh though.

One day I have to thank Kuma-kun for making me get snapchat, seriously.

I threw such a fit about how I'd never use it and I even deleted it once.

*laugh*

Weird that it ended up being useful and fun.

It actually is fun, Kingpin has the best snaps ever.

And I like when cute boy snaps me because we always send each other funny faces.

Blah, wow, I'm really writing a post about snapchat...Lordy, what has happened?

There was a point when I wanted to discuss existential philosophy in this blog, but I've somehow sunk to posts about snapchat.

Help.

Pink Penis Pancakes

A lot of my post titles are inside jokes; but I always end up forgetting the joke, and then nothing makes sense anymore.

Mister J said that if I grow my hair out long enough to sit on, he'll buy all my hair products for the rest of forever.

I'm all over the place today.

Honestly, lately I just feel really weird.

Like I've gotten over literally everything.

At the same time I feel a weird sense of nostalgia about the past....like loneliness, but not even that.

It's almost longing for a state of being, I guess.

And on top of all that I feel super hyper and more like myself than I have in an extremely long time.

Yet I still feel overwhelmed, slightly depressed, super frustrated.

I'm just a big ball of nerves and contradictions.

Maybe this is simply me finding myself again.

Also it could be the whole genuinely being single and not having any interest in that sort of thing, 'cause I haven't felt like that in over a year...

Actually this is kinda where I was before Kuma-kun, but more in the space before the vulnerability that made me think that having a relationship with anyone would be a good idea.

But if you think about it I've spent almost this entire year chasing guys....

Kuma-kun, Satan, Leo, various other rebound/casual dates.

Probably why I'm so hestitant to get involved with this cute boy who showed back up in my life, or why I get so uncomfortable when The Jester brings up the possibility of us dating in the future (his dad and dad's boyfriend keep mentioning it apparently).

I need to be alone right now, and for now I'm kinda happy like that.

My nails are a really pretty shade of purple.

I started reading the Dark Elf Trilogy yesterday, because Menzoberranzan feels like a better place than SoCal at the moment.

I should go heat up some curry, because I'm starving; but I'm too damn lazy.

Dinosaur Steroids

Is there even a reason to write?

Catwoman said things will never be the same between the three of us again.

She was talking about The Jester, we all hung out for the first time in like three years.

She's right.

The Jester said that he was wrong and can't handle being around her and that she's "not good for" him, because she was his first love.

Or something like that.

I haven't talked to him since we all hung out a few days ago.

Some part of me hopes that this hasn't sent him over the edge, and another part of me doubts that it would.

*sigh*

Otherwise I've been busy and absentminded.

And that is my life.

Because for all the whining and as unhappy as I usually am, some things don't change, and that's comforting.

The Jester and Catwoman will always be my best friends.

They're still the people that I open up to without even thinking about it.

It's the level of having all these years to grow from being strangers into being family.

So this is what I'm thankful for...the people who are my family, closer to me than my actual blood.