I wish that certain people would let go of grudges, particularly my step-dad....you see, once upon a time, a lot of things happened with Satan....
We've both grown up, yet my step-dad has a lingering grudge....
Could we ever fix something that has been destroyed so completely?
I wished that I could have a movie scene where the protagonist walks into a church and suddenly finds the person that they always were.
And then I heard the church bells, the pastor beckoned me inside.
Somehow, although I've never been Catholic or even Christian, his sermon gave me strength to forgive myself, to love the world again, and to let go of all the wrong that has transpired.
I'm letting my sweet boy go; as much as I cherished standing at his stove, he was fiddling with the dials....his arm around my waist.
His proclamation that my step-dad has reason to hate who he was in the past, because he hated who he was too.
His belief that if he ever was to meet my step-dad again that they would get along.
Secrets are what binds me to this pain, terrible secrets.
I have gained insight to my own demons and acceptance of those things that can't hold power over me anymore.
I'm letting him go, I'm letting the secrets go, the lies about who I am....about who I was.
I give it to the god that I now have faith in.
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