Teenagers

I used to be pretty cool.
But I guess I still am...
Ivy said I'm less psychotic....that's pretty funny.
Maybe I'm still completely insane, but in a different way than before.
This sounds like the ramblings of a teenager, probably because it is.
Sometimes I feel schizophrenic and I have to wonder if I could be.
Anyway, I can't believe how pregnant Ivy is, it's crazy.
Somebody recently told me that psychologists view the ages of eighteen through twenty as a transitioning phase.
This might be the most awkward age I've ever been at...
It's like you don't know your ass from a hole in the ground.

For Lack of a Better Title

I hung out with Ivy and Catwoman today, and it felt like old times...
Ivy is much easier to get along with, now that we've both matured.
I enjoy her company more than I enjoy Catwoman's, but we all go through stages of our friendships.
We talked a lot about the past...and about our cats...
It's so nice to feel like things might be more normal in the near future.
Anyway, I'm exhausted (I haven't slept yet)
But I'm sure I'll write more tomorrow, since I've been writing regularly lately.

Killing People is Bad

Is it customary for your roommate to put your clean laundry in a filthy laundry basket because she needs to use the dryer?
Especially when I'm literally down the hall and would have gladly moved it, if she would have simply asked.
I'm tired of living surrounded by idiots.
Omnipresent Being in the Sky help me...

What You Don't Know Can, and Will Hurt You

It's the new version of life.
Sometimes adulthood is lame.
I don't think anyone really prepared me for it.
Anyway, have I ever said that I'm in love with Ska music, it's like instant happiness.
I can't believe that I'm nineteen years old and my life is so off the rails, it's complete chaos all the time.
There's a lot of regrets sometimes, but maybe lessons were learned as well.
I couldn't tell you, because I'm still very young; I have much to learn, in the ways of The Force.
Star Wars has been one of my favorite movie trilogies since I was very young, I hate that Star Wars became trendy.
It would be different if new generations were finding love for the films, but it's not like that at all.
This probably happens to a lot of things over the course of one's life, everything is always changing.
Knowledge is everything in this life.
The more you know, the more prepared you are for what lies ahead.
I understand all of this is pretty cheesy...
Cheese is my favorite food; I wish I could join a Society of Cheese Lovers, so I could share cheese and wine with people.
I love red wine, though I don't drink heavily anymore.
This post is random, my apologies.

Hermitage

People stress me out, I mean literally everyone.
It's just like, "Nooooo! I will not text you back, call you, or friend you on Facebook!"
But that's just because it's so rare for me to find people who I get along with.
If I could find people who aren't obsessed with things that don't matter, I would be ecstatic.
Not that video games or fashion blogs matter, but I mean like other people's boyfriends and whether or not someone knows what dabs are.
Do you know what dabs are?
Probably not, because it's one of the most inconsequential things on the face of this planet.
It's just the fact that people will literally judge your character based on who you're dating, your use of slang, and whether you know anything about cannabis culture.
Does it matter?
Is everyone in California so shallow, or is it just my age group?
Am I boring for having the desire to spend my energy on anything more meaningful, or at least something interesting.
When did it become okay to criticize people for not having the same interests or the same personality as you?
After we've been friends for all these years and after everything that has happened, I cannot believe that this is what I hear from the people around me.
And then they expect me to play along, as if I'm a carbon copy of every one of my friends.
People with unique personalities are often misjudged and looked down on, I don't understand why.
Shouldn't we celebrate that everyone is different, instead of striving to be the same.
How can you spend your life working towards being someone else?

Back to The Fiery Chasm from Whence It Came

I'm so naturally pretentious, it's terrible.
Ivy is married and pregnant, I neglected to mention that.
We don't really talk anymore.
Catwoman is going to the Grand Canyon for her birthday, I don't want to go; because I hate her boyfriend and we're not really friends anymore.
There's a rift between us...
I don't think she knows who she is anymore, and I think I'm too guarded these days to have friends.
Which is why Satan is my only friend, but always with his bad moods.
I think I wanted to give him a new nickname for this blog, but I wouldn't know what.
He's lost too...
A funny thing happened when I returned to this city; this infamous boy became my best friend, in the weirdest way possible; but something happened between then and now....
It's because I live far away now, that's the likeliest explanation.
But there's a tension between us now, that I just can't seem to remedy.
This circumstance gets worse every time I see him, I fear our friendship may be at its end.
I have so few friends left after all that has transpired, I couldn't bear to lose yet another.
Time is strange, but I believe people fall into their rightful places eventually.
Destiny has a mind of its own.

Put it in The Pantry With Your Cupcakes

Just another song reference for a title.
So lately I've been thinking about the past, about how I used to be.
It's crazy to think about all the stuff that's happened and how everything has changed.
There's been a lot of dramatic changes, not all good.
Maybe I'm a better person, maybe a little less emotional.
Realism might kill me...
I believe it's time for a change.
In many cultures it is common knowledge that in order to change your perception of life, you must change your surroundings.
It might be time to resuscitate some old friendships, and sever others.
One last thing before I exchange this virtual world for the virtual world of Skyrim; I have the most adorable cats!
Their names are Andvari, who I named after a Norse troll who lives under a bridge; and Merlin, my darling Orange Tabby.
I've raised them from birth, and their mama was an American Wirehair Tabby cat, with the most intriguing markings.
Her name was Freyja; I recently gave her back to her previous owners, and I'm sure she's so happy to be home.
I might be obsessed with my cats....
Anyway, this blog needs some major reorganization.
Sometimes I wonder why I still write this blog, or if anyone ever reads it.

Where have I been?

Hell, it seems like, sometimes...

I understand this blog has become a haphazard, catastrophic mess of thoughts.

It's been over a year since I moved back to California, much has changed.

Catwoman is getting into harder drugs and her personality has changed completely.

It's as if she lost herself, or maybe she never knew herself at all.

Snuff did coke with a stripper on his birthday, I'm mortified by the conversation that followed between us.

What's happened to everyone?

The Jester finally lost his virginity at twenty years old, and his love for the idea of who he thought Catwoman was finally subsided.

His roommate is a douchebag...

Satan has become my only semi-sane friend, but he's extremely bipolar.

I enjoy his company though; and strangely enough, I think he enjoys mine too.

Except for the ever-present sexual tension between us...

I won't sleep with him for two reasons; the first being that a part of me still loves him deeply, and the second is that he's a very emotional person.

I don't know what it would do to our friendship if we went down that road.

I guess to sum all this up, we're all lost.

Nobody knows who they are, because we're at an awkward age...

We're all trying to figure out who we are.

A completely unrelated subject;

I've been totally obsessed with Pinup fashion and Pastel Goth lately.

Also Bruce Campbell, Army of Darkness is a movie that everyone should watch and enjoy.

And my kitty...

His name is Merlin.